18 October 2005

bell

we are home, again. home, settled into an apartment. at first i hated it. the first day. living among someone else's stuff. where do you fit in? but it's knowing where you will be, not for a night or two, but for almost three whole months. and that is nice. weekends i will be in another city, visiting my family, but they need that. and i guess i do too. it was hard to leave bell. harder than it even was at the camp. and she said over and over through the weekend, can i come with you? she is something. she looked over my shoulder at the pictures of the garden, before the hurricane, remnants on a memory card, and she said, that's my home, when it was good. that baby has been through so much change in her short life than many people have ever. certainly more than we all had until a few months ago. but she is a survivor, i knew that from birth. she has already known hardship, heartache but she will be better for it i think.