first roll

wow, i have so much respect for any photographer who uses a manual camera.

i*finally* put some film in my kick-ass nikon fa and attempted to take some shots. it was pretty miserable... so hot outside, i was sweating, gross... it's hard to hold the grey card in one hand and the camera in another, i hate the grey card... my hand is barely steady enough to focus and i can't even tell when that split image has come together... then when i think it's okay and press the shutter i realize i haven't advanced the film yet... i tried pretending i was rebecca romijn in her pink trench, but it didn't help.

(have you seen the bebe ad, i love it! it wasn't on the web site, but they do have a whole series with old gear called the spy who loved it. love it!)



it'll be really interesting and really embarrassing to see what comes out...
very tempting to revert to my point and shoot...

albert einstein

and here - drum roll, please - is my awesome tote bag that i sewed (!) last week out of an old favorite shirt of jack's that was much too faded and much much too big. i can't even describe how much i love this bag and the fact that i made it... the inside is lined in my favorite color purple, which coincidentally matched the writing on the back of the shirt/now totebag.


(front and back, just in case you can't tell...)

i am sick, with an infection that is driving me absolutely nuts, so it is a good time to be alone, and i am since jack is out of town until tomorrow night. i can't decide quite what to do, but i'm considering:

1- scanning the piles of pictures that i confiscated from my folks,

2 - working on my pretty skull apron, or

3 - finally watching pan's labyrinth. but i may still be too scared - scared of the scariness and scared of getting too depressed/sad. movies and books are way too capable of making me depressed. really. just last week i read marie antionette: the journey and it was so wonderful and well-written and i adore her so much now, but her life just broke my heart in two and i'm finally over it and really can't take any more heartbreak right now. maybe i feel too much?

oh! my photography class started and it's just so great. it's great just having someplace to go, so the class actually being great is a plus plus. i love my camera, almost to the point of being weird seeing as how i've still not actually put film in it, yet...

here's the piles i refer to above:

fear

my niece told several stories this weekend, in conversation, such as the little boy who somebody grabbed and cut off his head in wal-mart because he went on a different aisle from his mom. her grandmother tells her these stories to keep her in line, make her listen.

as i listened to my niece this weekend, i realized why i have always been afraid.

scattered today, sorry

look who was staring at me for a while outside of my "bedroom" window today:



seriously, look at that face, kind of creepy actually:



i am going crazy waiting for my new old camera to be delivered, supposedly today. it is so cool - i hope anyway. i know next to nothing about photography or cameras so i am feeling a bit scared but so excited! it's this old nikon from the 80s, like this one from kenrockwell.com - i love his articles by the way, very informative - but with chrome instead of all black.

i went to some shops around here, and they tried to talk me into buying a brand new (cheap) canon film camera for the same price, but it just didn't do it for me like the thought of that old used one. so, i chose interesting over reliable and you know, i love doing that, it is so so against the way i was raised.



looking through a magazine yesterday, i saw this shell ring (above) and remembered collecting shells with holes in them to make into jewelry last summer. i wonder where i put them? i also have a whole summer's worth of sea glass (below) that i want to do something with.



for years i've been wanting to recreate this little white shell that had been gilded and strung into a pendant that i had as a child. i think it was purchased as a vacation suviner, and i remember loving it so. the one in domino was around $300, but shell's are so delicate - wouldn't it break the first time you hit something with your hand? i need some new, fun jewelry. and there is so much out there...

the highlight of the quickie trip to new orleans:



simply heaven.

it's good to be home, although i will leave again very soon. this apartment is so peaceful. and also so, so cool. i love this bed, although it soon has to be replaced. i love the squirrels playing outside the window whenever i look up. i love being in the heart of downtown, but thinking it's a rainforest beach house. surprisingly, i really like living in texas. i don't want to ever move from this bed, this apartment, this town.

i always get so inspired on airplanes... maybe being somewhere new, having all that time to think, and loading up on magazines. i've been mulling over an art project for some time and i think i'm gonna give it a go. why not? i need something new to hang on the walls. (little by little we are getting the apartment right.)