my boyfriend is so cute. he wakes up about two hours before me and reads the news in bed. this morning, his first words to me were "reese and ryan are getting divorced." i like to think of this as my contribution to his character. it's a give and take really, like, now i know all about venture capitalists and the speed of light, and he, well, now he knows who k-fed is.
i'm floating again and it is scary.
i've forgotten how to be normal.
how to make friends, or just chat with someone in a grocery store line.
how to get a job.
i feel really really really down. i got in last night from new orleans and tomorrow i am flying to houston. i wish i could just curl up for a week in my bed and eat pumpkin ice cream. (i went to the store looking for pumpkin ice cream this morning, but i guess they don't make it. here at least, maybe nowhere.) i'm tired of magazines and packing and taking off my shoes to go through security. and of waiting.
maybe this will sound stupid, but i go to new orleans mainly to visit my 4-year-old niece. she stayed home from school this week and we just did whatever around the house. played and cleaned and went outside and cooked breakfast and matched socks. it was so great. and now i miss her so much i feel and actual ache in my throat/chest area. i feel tears coming whenever i think about it and i see her little pink room when i close my eyes. i feel for her so much.
she still can't sleep alone in her room. whenever i am there she wants me to sleep with her. we brush teeth and put on pajamas and pick out books and read then turn off the light. she sleeps holding your arm so you can't leave. it's heartbreaking. she couldn't fall asleep on night she said because she couldn't stop thinking about dying and she doesn't want to die. fucking heartbreaking. the light night we switched places and i slept by the wall. i woke up a little before two a.m. and just stared into the dark for a while. i saw her grab for me in her sleep but she was looking on the wrong side so she didn't find me. she cried a little but didn't wake up.
so we are getting the coolest-ever christmas tree, ultra-cool! we saw it last year at a vintage shop on magazine street, but it was a week after christmas and we had no storage at the time. even so, we almost bought it and contemplated just leaving it out all year.
i spent a really long time yesterday searching the internet for retro christmas trees (am i crazy? it's not even halloween!) and couldn't find one like this anywhere. i also searched the art deco sites. so maybe it was one of a kind? anyway, i mentioned to my boyfriend how great it would be this year and he totally agreed and he called the store (which has since moved from new orleans to houston) and can you believe they still have the tree? so we are buying it and having it shipped (now we even have the storage for it!).
i can't wait to post pictures -- wait till you see this tree, it's so amazing!
a couple of years ago i got a charm bracelet. i've since been adding charms that signify things, events, people in my life. i haven't updated for a year so i am a little behind, i need:
for my new (and only) nephew:
for new york city:
for moving to new england:
for our trip to virgin islands:
for my new lifestyle:
i've had charm bracelets before that were bought all made up already, and i recently read that they are back in style, but this is extremely different. they're just cheap silver charms, but they are so sentimental. i especially love visiting my niece who will count the charms, open them, and recite what they stand for.
my coffee grinder.
flying alone.
writing out bills.
picking up drycleaning.
here's my concession to halloween decorations this year:
i didn't even really need to get this little candle holder, since our living room (below is the mantle) is spooky enough year round, but i liked the pumpkin cider-flavored tea lights and he is awfully cute.
so, yeah, the bones and skulls belong to my boyfriend's son. but the thing on the left is actually the coolest thing ever:
it is a blinking eye. all day and night it blinks steadily, (LOOK WHAT IT DOES!) and sounds like a softly ticking clock. it doesn't scare my anymore. i don't know how much it costs because it was a gift, but you can buy it from rufus at eyethinkinc. it really is cool.
actually, halloween has been a favorite holiday of mine although this year i am not sure what to do. my favorite used to be the french quarter with all its freaks in costumes, fun and drunk and scary people everywhere. now what? salem?
i've also started thinking about christmas and i love the idea of these aluminum christmas trees:
i have to say it would look so so much cooler in my apartment because my apartment is so so much cooler than that house. it looks sort of out of place there. i don't want to take christmas too seriously, and these would lool cool with our furniture and paintings. i'm not sure how to decorate it though. i also want to make stockings even though i've barely ever made anything in my life and probably won't get around to it. stockings are my favorite part of christmas. i want a skull one for his older son, a scooby-doo one for his youngest and maybe just a pink and blue one for him and i. names of course. we'll see.
i just went through my closet, and you know i really don't have that many clothes. tshirts and jeans galore, but not anything special for fall and winter. i have a great black longsleeved dress from banana republic and a new black peacoat and fabulous knee high boots from the thrift store down the street that i've been wearing the heck out of, but that's it.
i do however have a few things that i want to get: a gray wool pencil skirt, some black tights and footless tights (to wear with socks and boots!), a black turtleneck, low black boots, sunglasses, and maybe even some flats like i see everybody wearing. and i think i really need this coat from french connection:
new york was gorgeous yesterday. all around. the hotel. the weather. the people. the park. the food. the shopping. and especially the boyfriend. everything was perfect.
i fell in love with a dog. i was almost ready to demand him (especially if he got the vintage rolex!) but then i remembered our lease says no absolutely no pets (or livestock, for that matter). he was so happy too, i'm sure someone took him home. i couldn't find him on the internet, but he looked like this puppy from petfinders:
we drove the 4 1/2 hours in and stayed for exactly 24 hours before driving the 4 1/2 hours back. i don't think it's crazy because we seem to always be doing things like that. always in a rush. so it was nice to drop him off at the airport today and make my way home to do nothing for a day.
nothing. i love this place now. the leaves are so pretty. it is so crisp (cold, freezing actually) outside. i'm getting the urge to pretty things up: light some falll scented candles, put on some pretty background music, make some pumpkin spice coffee. to really enjoy this place instead of running in and out of it. i'm getting in the holiday mood.
is it bad that i spent 20 minutes on the phone with a friend agreeing that, yes, marriage was way overrated, and yes, i am totally over it, and then 40 minutes looking at antique diamond engagment rings on the internet?
i am pretty particular about what touches my body in the bathtub. this no liquids thing was killing me, because i also like to pack light and forget about checking anything at the airport. thank goodness for the sample size clause so i can bring my own everything with me. that being said, in dc i loved the bathroom soapie things that i usually completely ignore. enough to remember to look up the products when i got home, from lather.com.
these in particular smell so good (and didn't give my any weird infections):
yuzu bergamot moisturizer
mint thyme shampoo--err, hair wash
lemongrass soap
guys, i got the internet! real true dsl and a wireless network. i just used a home phone for the first time in 2 years, and it did it while checking my email. i just hooked it up in about 15 minutes. the electrians were rude and loud, yes, but they did the job. happy birthday to me and maybe this means the landlord really will put up the satellite he's promising.
now i can post the picture i tried for 10 minutes to post earlier today on the stolen shaky-breaky wireless connection:
an interesting thing about boston is that when you order oysters you have to choose which kind you want. so different from new orleans where there is only one kind. so last week we got a sampler with four different kinds of oysters. now, i've said before how unsatisfactory the oysters up here are for a southern girl, but you know one of them was actually doable (even though they were $2.50 each!): well fleet. apparently, it is a town in cape cod.
i got this picture from woodbury's online where they say you can order dozens delivered next day. i love the way they call oysters "a taste of the wild ocean," so appropriate.
now if sake cafe would only open in massachusetts i would be a happy girl. the best sushi in the entire world (by far). we went about once a week when i lived there. if you are in new orleans you have to try their sake III roll. i would kill for it:
everytime i drive to work, the leaves are slightly different. they really are as pretty as they say. i keep wanting to talk pictures but when i have nothing else to do, i wind up sort of doing nothing. nothing that i planned that is, today i am baby-sitting the electricians that are supposedly hooking up our phone line. this apartment has been a bunch of crap. no cell phone reception (although there is a verizon store a block away -- there's no reception in the store either!), the phone and cable lines haven't been hooked up right even though there's a jack for each in every room. we've had no tv since we moved in (which is fine with me most of the time, but every once in a while you sort of want to flip some channels, it's the american way), and a leaky deck. the floor and baseboards are all warped, but i guess they fixed that too since there were carpenters hammering away the last two days. all in all, thank god it's a lease and not a mortgage.
we are looking for a nice little camp in texas hill country. we've been renting a cabin every other weekend to see the boys and would save money if we just bought an inexpensive house on a couple acres of land. that's fun.
about me:
i am lucky. i'm realizing that every day. for one, i had chips for lunch and cherry cheesecake and am probably about to go have some delicious clam chowder and a few beers for dinner. i do some variation of that every day and i weigh under 120 lbs. and i don't exercise really (although, actually, i think sex and walking places counts).
i travel a lot. and i love my travel partner. i can't even imagine wanting to go to buenos aires by myself because he is the best travel partner. (not that i even want to go to buenos aires.) we returned from toledo bend late last night and on friday we are driving to manhattan. i'm looking forward to the drive this time, i feel like i spend too many days in the airport. i had only flown twice when i turned 21 and boy am i making up for lost time.
i haven't blogged in so long, i haven't had any internet access at this stupid apartment, also no phone or cable or any-fucking-thing. but last night, mysteriously, a wireless connection came back to me. i don't know where from but thank god, so i'm just gonna blog randomly.
the library here rocks. it's a block from my house, plus you can order books from like a million other libraries right on the internet and they will get sent there to pick up. they email you when it's in. is that the coolest thing ever? i read a hundred photography books plus the unbearable lightness of being which i love and of love and other demons which was kind of depressing and the russian debutante's handbook which is weird so far.
also i've read every fashion magazine on the stands because i've been flying every freakin' weekend somewhere. really. this had led to thinking about fall fashion and since i have no style right now, i've decided i want to look like christina aguliera, which is impossible since i spend 3 minutes tops getting ready everyday and her "vintage bombshell" hair alone would take me an hour. i did let me boyfried buy me a fancy lowcut black dress which i love and i don't even feel bad about it. i've been working! at his office and it's so busy. just until they hire someone next month and i go in late and leave early, but still it counts.
i'm making tiny cherry cheesecakes in heart-shaped tins today. i need to send my sister the suri cruise vanity fair. what a cute little baby. i still love katie holmes. i'm listening to a cover of enjoy the silence from copy, right? (i love that site; i love covers period; plus, i still love mazzy star!). i also saw robert weingarten's palette series gallery in dc last weekend and his art was really cool. i'm inspired again to start painting and hanging shit up.
